The Brutally Honest “Friend”

There’s a common misconception among people that as long as you are honest, you remain a kind person. The concept of “brutal” honesty can cross a line that goes from telling someone what they need to hear, to telling someone what you want to say.

In other words: the help, and advice no longer comes from the heart. It comes from the simple act of wanting to be brutal.

This is something we may come across all the time. Maybe a friend, or someone you know may proudly proclaim to being an “asshole.” In the toxicity of the mix, we may be fooled into believing these people are our friends because they warned us. But the reality of the situations always lead to the same conclusion. Their “honest” brutality is hurtful, and they may even brag about not caring because “you needed to hear that.”

Their honesty brutality becomes an excuse to be able to talk to you any way they deem appropriate. They may even publicize their lack of remorse, and mock your feelings “here’s a band-aid. hahaha.” An attempt to make you appear too sensitive.

The honesty becomes mean-spirited, and you’re left to wonder why, if this person is your friend, you feel worse after talking to them.

As SmartBlogger puts it:

Many people think that the point of brutal honesty is to shock someone into hearing you. They think that the point is to be so harsh that the other person can’t help but hear the truth.

But that’s not really how it works. Treating people harshly will only make them less receptive to what you have to say, not more.

2019 mood – in the words of Katy Perry: “Watch out for the Regina George in sheep’s clothing…”