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Can We Cancel Selena Gomez Yet?


Jul. 9 2018, Published 2:09 a.m. ET

On July 2nd Rolling Stone named “Back to You” by Selena Gomez the “song of the summer” and I rolled my eyes so hard that I still can’t see straight.

It’s not that “Back to You” isn’t a good song. It’s catchy, it’s easy listening, and it’s defiantly suited to summer. But here’s the thing, I literally had no idea that song was by Selena Gomez until Rolling Stone made the announcement. It’s like that with most of her songs. “Good for You” was played on the radio constantly when it first came out. But even after hearing it dozens of times I couldn’t identify the singer as Selena.

Think about it, what does a Selena Gomez song sound like? It’s impossible to pin her sound down because her sound is generic. More importantly, what does Selena Gomez’s voice sound like? I’ve heard her songs and listened intently to her live performances and I still can’t pin down how she sings. I know what she sounds like when she kind of quietly talks to a tune, but singing? No idea. That’s why I can’t identify a Selena Gomez song on the radio. Because she can’t sing, so when her songs are produced her voice is masked as much as possible to the point where she is indistinguishable from any other female singer.

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Selena Gomez overall always seems to be getting insane levels for attention for doing not very much. In 2016 she became the most followed person on Instagram. But why? She was super funny as Alex in “Wizards of Waverly Place” but since them, everything she’s done has been pretty boring.

So henceforth I call for us to cancel Selena Gomez, and find someone more worthy of our collective attention.

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